What are you coming to tell me?
Do not bring me anything that doesn’t have apposite details, please.
Why has the antiquated opinion that contraception is dangerous to society resurfaced?
Because this ersatz politics is simply thinly-veiled misogyny. The purpose of creating this false tension (e.g. women are incapable of making autonomous decisions about their bodies) keeps the discourse noisy, distracting, and catatonic. It’s salacious rhetoric and it sells.
“There are few ways in which a person can exercise more power in a relationship than by consciously playing with it.” [Nomy Lamm, make/shift issue no.10, pg 17]. Lamm was giving advice to someone struggling with a long-term BDSM relationship break-up but the agency translates beyond interpersonal politics. The leverage point in Lamm’s advice is consciousness. To be conscious is to be awake; aware.
This realism can be magical. As William Stafford so eloquently states in A Ritual to Read to Each Other,
“For it is important that awake people be awake,
or a breaking line may discourage them back to
the signals we give–yes or no, or maybe–
should be clear: the darkness around us is deep.”
So if you are unable to see this darkness and translate these critical details, then you do not have my attention. No matter which side you hustle.